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July 2009



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Sometimes there are days where I need to talk. I need to spill. I feel words in my mouth, raging forward, trying to explode into the air. Days I just need to tell.

Then there are days like today. I don't want to talk. I don't want to tell, I just want to sit here quietly and watch you. Try to figure you out, try to figure me out, try to figure the world out. And when I'm quiet, like I am today, people feel the need to talk to me. To ask me what's wrong, to ask me why I'm so quiet today. They don't understand that somedays, you just need to shut the fuck up.

I wish I was the president, so that every once in a while, I could declare a National "Shut the Fuck Up Day". That way people would think, instead of blathering on. A moment of silence isn't enough, you need an entire day. Because you tell everyone we need a moment of silence, and people are just thinking of what they're going to say, as soon as that moment of silence is over.

On quiet days, I just want to think a bit, mull over the things that are happening to us. You know, you absolutely know, what's wrong. If today's a quiet day, and Saturday we just got robbed for all our rent money, then you don't need to ask me what's wrong.

I think it's a bit obvious what might be up.

Sometimes on quiet days, it's not because I'm feeling low, or feeling depressed. Maybe that's a day that I can't get over how great I feel. How much I love you. Maybe that's a day where I just want to let the happy sink in, so that way I can feel it all the way in my bones. On quiet days like that, I just want to snuggle, and stare at you, and just be quiet. So that way my mouth doesn't get to talking too much and fucking up my happy feeling.

Quiet days don't always mean I'm having a bad day, honey. Sometimes that means I've a had a few too many good days in a row. Call it a "happy overload day".